Apparently, after 6 weeks of fighting to go home, it only takes 3 days to want to get back out. At least, that was the case this Friday. We all met at the Olive Garden and had a quiet and enjoyable lunch. Dad has been fighting to regain an appetite the last few weeks, but did well with a plate of fettuccine alfredo. He's trying to get beyond the thickened liquids, but clearly still has to be careful with water consistency.
24 hours later, we celebrated my youngest daughter's birthday with the extended family. A houseful of guests including Dad. He seemed genuinely happy to be at the festivities, but had to work through over-stimulation with all of the noise and commotion. Through no fault of his own, I think he might have been the real hit of the party. He was certainly greeted warmly by everyone.
Overall, he's clearly much happier than he was prior to coming home. And that's understandable. I'm not sure that he's progressed substantially in terms of independence related to mobility, and his ability to handle most day to day tasks without assistance. On the flipside, he's resting and eating better. By better, I should qualify that it isn't necessarily the nutitional quality of the food that's improved, but his attitude and appetite.
Things are only starting to gear up as it relates to continued rehabilitation. He received a visit Friday from the home health folks. He's still getting around in the temporary wheelchair, and my brother has helped tremendously with an improvised ramp and other necessities. I'm confident that as his strength continues to improve, he'll make more gains towards independence.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Dad goes home
6 weeks, 3 days and 12 hours after leaving for the emergency room, Dad has returned home.
Ironically, it wasn't to great fanfare or celebration. We were strongly encouraging him to stay in a 24 hour nursing facility for another few weeks. Doctor's orders, and our own concerns in terms of his care.
He reluctantly gave the facility a 24 hour try, but refused to stay any longer. So we scattered in all directions to locate a wheelchair, shower seat, etc., to assist in his home care. Mom is bravely adopting the role of live-in nurse, knowing full well that she still has a home remodel to finish, and a career that has been set to the side for the last 6 weeks.
My younger brother has agreed to help out during the day, in hopes of giving Mom some time to attend to business, as well as her own mental health. I'm sure that we'll make things work, and confident that as time goes on, Dad will need less assistance.
I'll admit that he is already much happier than I've seen him since this all began. Happier, more content, relaxed and even healthier. We all converged on the house this evening, kids in tow, and talked with him as time allowed. As we left the neighborhood, it was my 12 year old that spoke up and said, "I like Granddad better at home."
Me too honey, me too.
Ironically, it wasn't to great fanfare or celebration. We were strongly encouraging him to stay in a 24 hour nursing facility for another few weeks. Doctor's orders, and our own concerns in terms of his care.
He reluctantly gave the facility a 24 hour try, but refused to stay any longer. So we scattered in all directions to locate a wheelchair, shower seat, etc., to assist in his home care. Mom is bravely adopting the role of live-in nurse, knowing full well that she still has a home remodel to finish, and a career that has been set to the side for the last 6 weeks.
My younger brother has agreed to help out during the day, in hopes of giving Mom some time to attend to business, as well as her own mental health. I'm sure that we'll make things work, and confident that as time goes on, Dad will need less assistance.
I'll admit that he is already much happier than I've seen him since this all began. Happier, more content, relaxed and even healthier. We all converged on the house this evening, kids in tow, and talked with him as time allowed. As we left the neighborhood, it was my 12 year old that spoke up and said, "I like Granddad better at home."
Me too honey, me too.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Thinking ahead
It's probably Dad's fault, now that I think of it. The fact that I can't get into any situation without automatically running through all of the possible scenarios, and what I should do, or how I should react in each case. Maybe everyone does that, I really have no clue.
In any case, from the moment that I thought Dad was out of the woods, I've wondered how we would care for him going forward. How far would he progress, what level of care would he need, and how would we, as a family, provide that care.
Towards the end of last week, my wife, daughters and I came to the conclusion that the only logical solution was for Mom and Dad to move in with us. To make a long story much shorter, we are in the process of building a new house. Same basic floor plan, same neighborhood, same builder, but that's another story for another blog.
The basic house isn't overly large, somewhere in the neighborhood of 2700 s.f. It's a 2-story home with 4 bedrooms, a study and a 3-car garage. The basic idea is to connect another structure through the breakfast area. We can add over 1,000 s.f. without infringing on any of the building lines.
The addition should have a sizable master bedroom, bathroom and closet. All accessible by wheelchair without feeling like a hospital room or nursing center. Additionally, a full sized living or great room to allow Mom and Dad separation if the chaos of my own family sometimes gets to be too much. All of that connected back to the main house via a wide corridor filled with floor to ceiling windows.
There's still a lot of work to do. We haven't sold our existing house, and Mom and Dad were working towards doing the same thing. They were in the throes of a complete remodel when Dad was stricken with the "brain attack". My brother has done an admirable job of trying to complete the remodel on his own, and the house is really getting close to being market ready.
After visiting with all family members the last few days, I think we're all comfortably in agreement on the plan. Sell both houses first, my family will move into our new house as planned. Hopefully, we'll have all the plans done by the time we close, and can begin construction on the addition immediately. If we're lucky, and all goes well, then we should be prepared for Mom and Dad within 6-8 months. The interim will be a little tricky, but I think it's made more manageable with a long-term plan that everyone believes in.
In any case, from the moment that I thought Dad was out of the woods, I've wondered how we would care for him going forward. How far would he progress, what level of care would he need, and how would we, as a family, provide that care.
Towards the end of last week, my wife, daughters and I came to the conclusion that the only logical solution was for Mom and Dad to move in with us. To make a long story much shorter, we are in the process of building a new house. Same basic floor plan, same neighborhood, same builder, but that's another story for another blog.
The basic house isn't overly large, somewhere in the neighborhood of 2700 s.f. It's a 2-story home with 4 bedrooms, a study and a 3-car garage. The basic idea is to connect another structure through the breakfast area. We can add over 1,000 s.f. without infringing on any of the building lines.
The addition should have a sizable master bedroom, bathroom and closet. All accessible by wheelchair without feeling like a hospital room or nursing center. Additionally, a full sized living or great room to allow Mom and Dad separation if the chaos of my own family sometimes gets to be too much. All of that connected back to the main house via a wide corridor filled with floor to ceiling windows.
There's still a lot of work to do. We haven't sold our existing house, and Mom and Dad were working towards doing the same thing. They were in the throes of a complete remodel when Dad was stricken with the "brain attack". My brother has done an admirable job of trying to complete the remodel on his own, and the house is really getting close to being market ready.
After visiting with all family members the last few days, I think we're all comfortably in agreement on the plan. Sell both houses first, my family will move into our new house as planned. Hopefully, we'll have all the plans done by the time we close, and can begin construction on the addition immediately. If we're lucky, and all goes well, then we should be prepared for Mom and Dad within 6-8 months. The interim will be a little tricky, but I think it's made more manageable with a long-term plan that everyone believes in.
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